were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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