what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
