you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
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