Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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