Jerry, you need to find god
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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