so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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