She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Your penis caused this!
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