Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
