Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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