grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
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