the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
