whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize