Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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