she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
