Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
