i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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