Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize