do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
