omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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