It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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