If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
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