She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
