We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
