she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Let's paint friendship bongs
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
