I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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