the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
