hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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