sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
