Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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