I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
it's not cheating when I paid for it
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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