I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
