I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
You're like the curious george of whores
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
