The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Randomize