Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
