thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila