It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
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scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
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I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I feel like I smell like bad decisions