His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Randomize
