He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize