I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
third nipple confirmed
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
