come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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