turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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