everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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