We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
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