What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
she peed on how many people?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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