Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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