i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
