Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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