I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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