remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
