guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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