i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
