fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
