I love black thongs
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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